Sorry there guys, I thought I had posted since my post about Dan's death. Didn't mean to leave it on such a sad topic!
Goodbye July, don't let the door hit you in the keester as you leave! While a strong blend of good and bad, July was a tough month! Good things... parents' 50th wedding anniversary, trip home to Utah, time with Anna, time with Georgie the next week, got to see Harry play...finally (if only for a little while), and am settling into my new role as a BA on the NJKiDS project. Difficult things... ironically enough - trip home to Utah (for some reason, its always a little hard on my spirit, haven't figure it out yet) and settling into my new job as a BA, and a slew of losses...Uncle Dave, Susie's baby, and dear friend Dan.
As for the loss of my friend, I'm ok. I get sad if I think about it too much... but I do that when I think about my gf Karalee who has been gone for 12...13?... years too (this August). I was talking to my mother recently and she said she was sorry to hear about Dan and it was clear that she, and the rest of my family, did not understand why his death hit me so hard. It wasn't until I explained that I wasn't mourning the passing of a long-since past love, I was mourning the loss of a friend and how we came to BE such good friends after all the crap of our romance that she understood.
So, its August... 22 years ago this time I was hugely pregnant and thinking it would never end and dreading when it did since even then I knew the pregnancy was the easy part. LOL So, happy birthday month, my baby girl! You are the best thing I ever have done and ever will do. And I'm so very proud of the young woman you are today.
August started with a bang. I pulled one of my work-all-weekend-with-no-sleep things and its taken most of this week to recover. I went from being absolutely sick from exhaustion to a huge wave of the lonelies on Friday. Fortunately, it all passes with a little time and I am good. I seldom get bowled over by the lonelies anymore... but once in awhile...WHAM... in the kisser! So, I have a little pity party and wallow a tad... and then I synch up the girls and get on with things! August is a precursor to Fall! I love FALL! My soul always picks up then.
Took the truck into the shop today because the AC had stopped working...again. I figured it was the belt, as it has been the last 6 times... this time the belt was still in place and needed tightening. So, I was happy that that's all it was... and at no charge! wOOt! New Jersey has been in the throes of a heatwave and it seems to have subsided every so slightly. Still, AC is a good thing to have!
In an effort to get a grip on myself, I am cleaning things out of the apartment... I have a vision for what I'd like it to look like for the next year so slowly but surely I am taking steps in that direction. I have also noticed that my abundance of clothing is beginning to dwindle... because as I lose weight there are just too many things I can't keep wearing! Dang... I know, its tragic. Its also cathartic! It has been at LEAST 10 years since I started wearing my pre-Weight Watchers size... so many of the things are old as well. So is nice to get rid of that size. I am not buying a ton of new clothing because I can't do that each time I go down a size...so the room in the closet is growing. More empty hangers than clothes it seems... and theres more I need to go through! Good stuff!
All in all, I'm good. I have some re-centering to do, I feel a little off to the left. Not really a surprise given the last couple of months and once in awhile I think we all need an alignment.
So here's the deal...
13 years ago
