Seeking Soulmate, circa 2009

Whether you are seeking a soulmate or not, please give this a read... it's good stuff for anyone!

During many of my years in New Jersey I would fly US Air back home to Utah to see my family.  Many of those trips took me through Phoenix, where my fabulous cousin, Marilyn Bunn, lives and works for Southwest Airlines.  If I was lucky, I had a nice long layover and she had a day off (or late shift) and we were able to get together and share a meal and some great gab. 

It was sometime in 2009, before August, when one such trip was made and during our visit Marilyn recommended I check out the book "Soulmate Secret" by Arielle Ford.  I had read other books and anyone who knows me knows I wanted to find 'the one', desperately at times.  So, I figured, why not?  http://soulmatesecret.com

It's a small book, a mere 232 pages, dedicated to finding love using techniques associated with the law of attraction.  Now, hold on, don't dismiss it as 'woo-woo' stuff.  The way -I- experienced the book was that it was about being ready, because if I wasn't ready, it wasn't likely I was going to attract it.  Still, not a new idea but some of her techniques were new to me.  Or perhaps I had heard these things before but for some reason I was finally ready to act. 

There are many exercises that I found valuable, that ultimately was more about ME than finding 'the one'.  And that's what I want to talk about.... oh, and I know the date because I dated one of my exercises... 8/29/09.

My Soulmate List... without the book in front of me I have to pull from my memory what they were intended to be and do.  So this list was to be a thoughtful list of qualities I wanted in my soulmate.  Not a list to be taken lightly because, as so frequently happens with the Law of Attraction, you'd better really want it because it WILL happen.   My list was made and those things that were 'deal breakers' were starred.

While there are many exercises in the book, it is the following exercise that made the biggest difference in my life... my LIFE, not just my search for my soulmate.  I was amazed by what came out on the paper and surprised by some of the people I needed to forgive along with myself.  I really believe this exercise, sincerely completed, can help ANYONE who has been hurt, disappointed, saddened, or anything else by relationships in their past.  It is NOT exclusive to past romantic relationships.  

Try it.

With paper and pen, write the following statement:
"I completely and totally forgive myself for these actions and I completely and totally forgive for their actions.  I now bless myself and and gratefully accept this healing of my heart. And so it is. 

Now start as far back as you need to... friends, family, lovers, would be loves, anyone.  If you are like me, I had to start with 'now' and work backwards.  And you write 'the letter'...a paragraph, two pages, one page, ten... whatever it takes.  Talk to them about what hurt, angered, saddened, caused regret about your relationship with them.  And at the end... word for word... write the above paragraph.  You absolutely MUST forgive yourself!

I was a wee bit skeptical about it, I admit it. But after the first one, which was lengthy, I realized just how much I wanted to forgive myself and them. And while dredging up some of that stuff, buried a long time, caused some tears and latent sadness, it was time.  And I found myself eagerly looking to the end so I could LET IT GO.  And a little bit at a time, it DID go!  Relief! 

That was almost 3 1/2 years ago.  I had completed the work and set aside the notebook I'd used.  And went on. It got packed up in my move back to Utah in March '12.   Shortly after I moved back I found my soulmate... it was just crystal clear to me one day (someone I knew many years ago as a co-worker) when we met again.  I remember my thought being "oh, that is who I was waiting for, yay!".  I just had to wait a little while for him to realize it too... and he did. 

So now we are planning our wedding in July and I couldn't be happier or love him more. I get a silly grin when I think of marrying him and I love to look at my ring and I love to hear his ring tone or see him online in the mornings (when I'm in DC).  All of it finally paid off.  Exactly as it was supposed to, when it was supposed to (something I most seriously believe, things happen when and how they are supposed to).

And my list? I went searching for the notebook in my boxes.  My soulmate list from 8/29/09... he has EVERY quality on that list, dealbreaker or not.  EVERY one.  And so many things I didn't even think of. 

And those pages of forgiving that freed me have now been removed from my notebook, without reading them, I didn't need to, didn't want to. It is over, my heart is full of so many other wonderful things.

Be careful what you ask for!!! Happy forgiving youself and those in your past. Without it, you may not have room in your heart for someone else, no matter how badly you might want it.

My 2 cents.. :)  Thank you, Universe!

It seems like a month of Sunday's since I've written anything... so the beginning of 2013 is as good a time as any to post. 

First... note to self, email daughter to update blog decor.  Woefully outdated.  lol

Second... wow, REALLY?  2011?  YIKES! Now I'm just embrarrassed given the monumental events of 2012!

As I write, I am sitting in a hotel room in Washington, DC.  This is not an unusual thing.  It's my life.  Let me back up...

In early 2012 I was working on a position in Nevada, thinking living closer to home would be good enough.  And it would have.  Except something better came along and I was able to take a job thata let me relocate from NJ to UT and working in Washington DC.  I know, head scratching, isn't it?  Here's how it works... every other week I fly to Washington and spend the week (sometimes two) at the Child Support Agency for the District, the weeks I am not flying I am telecomuting and working from home.  Home now being Salt Lake City. 

This began in April. Gordon, big brother,flew out to NJ at the end of March and drove from NJ to UT with me. Took a week.  Started the new job the next week. 

I love my job.  The company has been good to me.  The role of Business Analyst is significantly different from NJ to be challenging and give me new things to learn.  I am also very pleased to be working with my friend, Lori, again.  We worked together in NJ for the first year I was there and the chance to work with her again was a huge bonus. 

I love that my job let's me LIVE in SLC.  I KNOW... hell was going to have to freeze over before THOSE words crossed my lips (or fingertips).  I cannot confirm a frigid drop in temperature there, but I suspect it cooled down a few degrees.   It is great to be back near my family and especially with aforementioned daughter. 

So that's the move stuff.  And the job stuff.  All terrific and just fell so neatly together that I KNEW it was meant to be.

Speaking of meant to be... on Christmas Day I got engaged to a wonderfully sweet man.  I don't know if I mentioned it to too many people but whenever I pleaded with the Universe for a soulmate I had the distinct impression that I had already met him.  It confused me, because I couldn't imagine who I was supposed to recycle.  Well, it turns out I was not supposed to recycle anyone... thank goodness... because while I had indeed already met 'him', we were nothing more than work aquaintenances. 
 
While we met back in the 90's, we didn't really become friends until March 2011 when he had become friends with my brother (real friends).  It was when he became friends with my brother on Facebook and saw me on HIS list that we reconnected.  Even then we were just friends. It wasn't until I had moved back and we started having lunch occassionally that things changed. By the end of July, it was clear that we were meant to be ever so much more. 

And we are.  So much more.  And so very, very good. And will be getting married on July 27, 2013!!

To be sure, this is the Cliff Notes version.